Tuesday, 31 January 2012

losing grip~

tajuk nak avril lavigne aje..
aha..
suke ati la nak tajuk ape..
tp 2 la ape yg sy rasa..
like i hv no stand to hold on..
it feels like when you are crossing hanging bridge..
gayat nooo~

alahai,
tahun2 akhir cmni slalu wat rasa tak tenteram,
jiwa berkecamuk,
marah xmenentu,
banyak persoalan yang berada di minda,
banyak tanda tanya dan juga kata kerja.eyh.
siap baca sambil nyanyi nampak? 

ok2..
back to business..
bile saat2 genting macam ni,
rasa mcm sume tak kena..
dah 5 tahun belajar pn rasa xtau pape..
and you should know that I'm a person with low self-esteem..
bile orang bagi sentap sket dah rasa
incomplete me.
then dah tak tau mana nak start balik dah.
huwaaa..
nape idup makin lama makin susah
dulu senang je idup..
nak balik umur 12 tahun..
main anak patung..
main kawen2..
main tudung botol..

n then no one would say to me..
"that's ok..
just take it easy..
thing would turn ok.."
cause the ones that I used to have..
I used to share laughs and tears..
are getting far and farther from me..
left me here all alone..
with my own imaginations and dream..
.....

then only I think,
maybe it's the way that Allah wants me to be..
to show me there's only Him no one other that would be..
the One and only to be held,
when I'm losing grip..


photo source

Sunday, 29 January 2012

I wish I were in the dream~

td tido saya mimpi saya jumpe dgn sorang budak.rambut blonde.comel.kiut.miut.peluk saya.nangis2 saya peluk budak tuh.so nama dia yg muncul dlm mimpi tu eve.dia student saya dkt gladstone.bile bangun trus bukan folder gamba2 dkt gladstone.



huwaaa..rindunye..walau hingus meleleh,pekat,hijau,likat..rindu jgk ngan diorg.mesti diorg dh besaq kan.rindu cikgu cantik tu jgk.ok.so rindu je lah nk ckp.orang kate kalau kite mimpi orang tu bmakna orang tu pun rindu kite?betul x ni?so,eve misses miss khazali? erk =.= ok tak2.miss khazali miss all room 1 members.hope one fine day we'll meet again.*in your dream* kalau duit dah lebih sgt pas dah g haji n umrah baru bole g auckland kot,n budak2 ni pun dah tua dah.

Sunday, 15 January 2012

new challenges are coming~

alhamdulillah,already in Malaysia for 1 month and 19 days..seems it just a short length of time,but for me it's enough to adapt myself in Malaysia environment..the temperature which I need to bear for the rest of my life, the food which should be less than I had in NZ *ehem2*, the way people see me *ekhemmmm* and the way I look at people.. there are lots of differences but nothing to be compared.. every place has it's own good sides and also weaknesses.. it just ourselves which need to be flexible..chewwahh..

never mind, like you care all those things, right? what's important I'M BACK.. .. .. .. ?? ok I repeat it again I'M BACK.. *hope you have to shout YEAY in you mind* yes!!! I'm back to my home.. to my lovely family..they are missed a lot while I was there.. and the most recent, to my beloved maktab.. who says there was nothing to be missed about maktab? I would rather say, I love maktab, I miss lots of memories when I was here..even I'm already here, the memories could not be repeated *ehem2* but as the title would suggest, there are more and more challenges are coming..as usual, for TESL@TESOL students, the name of the course already makes us sounds or looks weird to others.. but the most recent gossip i heard about my cohort is, WE ARE RICH? *am I?* I think some of us, because they were working too hard while they were there,so I think their sacrifices and hardship are worth now.. but not ALL of us do.. because at least 1 *that is me* out of 59 is not rich.. but i like the gossip though, because I like to be called rich even I just"tumpang sekaki" the title..thanks for the DOA..Hopefully I will be rich as you wish..Aminnn~

ok, stop it.. Now I am moved on to hostel life.. Last year I was in apartment..everything provided..easy life there huh? the biggest challenge in hostel life is, I NEED TO WASH MY CLOTHES MANUALLY all the time..I hate washing clothes for sure..last time I just operated the machines until the clothes are ready to be folded..but now.........i'm not comparing ok..even at home my father does all the washing-clothes matter because it's his hobby I tell you..proud to have a very hardworking daddy..huhu..without my daddy, my days are difficult..sob sob.. and the last challenge is, I really need to take bath twice a day because I will be sweat easily here..haiyooo..you know that taking bath is the hardest part in my life? ok,got to take my bath now..salam~
I do miss my life in Auckland
But I am enjoying my life over here :)